Do you believe in miracles? Do you believe that God truly exists? If you don’t, then this is a good story to read.
A lot of people don’t know our story behind becoming pregnant. In fact, most people don’t have the slightest idea. Even the ones closest to us. But, I couldn’t think of a better time or platform to share and spread our miracle news to everyone. God is real. And, His love is ever so present.
When I was in my mid 20’s something just wasn’t right inside of me. I was having a lot of female problems. Ones I couldn’t figure out on my own. Something just wasn’t right. After 6 months of experiencing all these problems, I finally picked up the phone and called my Mom. She immediately got me home and into the doctors office. Our family doctor couldn’t quite figure out the issue. So, she set out to find me help. The best help she could think of. She got me in with one of the top specialists around. This man was supposed to be the best. He actually wrote many of the books on female anatomy. And, get this…his waiting list was 3 years long. I got in the next week. So, the fact she got me in with him seemed to be a huge miracle on its own.
This started days & weeks of different x-rays, tests, and this and that. I was covered in cysts. Top to bottom. Left to right. I had so many cysts covering my insides and that’s what was causing all my issues. My x-rays looked like the sky at night filled with stars. Finally, after weeks of all these tests, I had my final appointment with him. My mom and I went to the appointment, waited patiently in the room, and then he entered. He barely sat down long enough to recite the news he was about to give me. He was very nonchalant, he was very cold and he was very uncaring. He then said, “You won’t ever be able to have kids. You need to go ahead and consider a hysterectomy.” And, he walked out of the room. Just like that. Never looked back. There was never any type of empathy or explanation really. My mom and I looked at each other and left. She was way more devastated than I being as she knew the weight of those words. I understood them, but at 25 it didn’t seem ‘real’. The weeks and months following were just filled with more medications. None of any importance. Just medicine.
I began telling people the news & making jokes that I would never be able to have kids. I would never be a mother. It became a routine. It became a habit. Muttering those words. It was always easier to just laugh it off and make it seem like it wasn’t a big deal to me. That I didn’t want kids anyway. It was easier to tell people that way, to joke about it, ya know? I had a few more issues following. Small issues. Mostly just female problems. These became routine to me, as well. My female issues that is. I quit seeking help for them because as the specialiast so kindly told me, there was basically nothing he could or would do about it. And, I believed him. My life went on. Very normal. Then, Matt came into the picture. We actually knew each other from college. We went to UT and worked together in our college years. Just friends, though. So, when he popped up in my life 8 years later I was very surprised. The minute I saw him after all those years, I knew he would be the man I would marry. You always hear people tell stories like this, or watch these romantic movies where its serendipity that intervenes. Well, it’s true. Our love story is just that pure. The first time we saw each other after all those years we just knew. He had actually told someone we used to work with a decade before that he was going to marry me one day. And y’all, I just knew too. After only dating for about 6 months, he proposed to me. And, from that moment on we knew we wanted to have a child together. He knew my news that I wouldn’t be able to have kids and it never phased him. He always said “we’ll find a way.” With his work he is around radiation a lot. Literally everyday. We also knew he might have a reproduction issue, as well. When we got married the following April, we agreed that we would wait a year to just enjoy each other and travel before we sought fertility help. So, we did. We travel all over the US for his work, so being stable long enough to find a fertility specialist was going to be a chore. Or, so I thought. We ended up in California where he works so hard. I’m just so proud this man is my husband, y’all. I’m so grateful for him. Anyways, I found a doctor here and started seeing her in June to start this process. We just did the basics at first which was just checking on my body. Everything looked good. After that we did x-rays to check everything. Y’all…my x-rays showed that nothing was wrong with me. There wasn’t one single cyst. There wasn’t one single thing wrong with me. That starry night sky it used to look like inside of me from all the cysts…were gone. They were non-existent. She never believed I ever had anything wrong. So much so, she requested my records from my previous specialist. She looked & studied over them, and looked at my current x-rays and just said it as simply as she could, “It’s a miracle, child.” 7 years later I was healed. With no treatment. No medicines. No doctor appointments. Nothing. I was just healed. If you still don’t believe in miracles, just wait.
Then came our next issue, was it Matt? Was it still me? Why weren’t we able to reproduce? What was going on inside of our bodies? She continued to see me a few more times before our first set fertility appointment that was on September 9th. This appointment was it. This appointment was to start our entire fertility journey to become pregnant after all the prereqs were finished. We were so excited, y’all! You have no idea. I just knew this was the answer. Matt wouldn’t have to see me crying every night because I wanted to become pregnant so badly. He wouldn’t have to change the TV channel anymore if it were on a show or movie about having a baby. He hated to see me upset and crying over being infertile. He knew how badly I wanted to give him a child. And, how badly I wanted to be a mother. It was a hard time for us. I would find myself in a dark place where Matt would have to dig me out of. I would find myself just crying all the time for no reason. I would never let anyone know how I was truly feeling. Not my friends, family, anybody. This is such a private matter that most people have no clue the weight it holds over you.
Well, August was ending and we were prepping for this appointment that was only days away. Full of joy, hope and just pure happiness that this was finally going to happen. I woke up one morning right before this appointment and something just wasn’t right. I didn’t feel well. I was sick, so sick! Thinking it was nerves about my upcoming appointment, I carried on. I was on Facetime with Kirstie (like always) and she jokingly said, “you’re probably pregnant, Mace.” and, we laughed. The following morning I woke up extremely early because I was so nauseous. When you’re wanting to be pregnant so badly, sometimes you trick your body into feeling pregnant. Trust me. I thought that was the case, but I took a pregnancy test anyways. What happened next, I will never forget. I was pregnant. Those lines showed up so fast that I couldn’t believe my eyes. I just started crying in the bathroom. I ran out, ran in the bedroom, with tears flooding down my face, screaming at Matt that we were pregnant! He was in shock. Hard to believe because how could this be possible without us starting our fertility treatment? What y’all don’t know is, this was the same morning we were set for our first fertility treatment. We rushed to our doctor, and without hesitation she confirmed we were absolutely pregnant. Tears. Joy. Happiness. Every emotion you could think of, we felt. We couldn’t believe it. We actually still found it hard to believe it was true. Til this day, we sometimes find ourselves laughing because it still seems so unreal.
Still don’t believe in miracles? Because, I do. This was nothing short of Gods love. This was nothing short of our obedience to him the past couple of years. This was nothing short of an answered prayer. I prayed every single night. Every single day for the past couple of years to become pregnant. I put everything I had into becoming the woman he craved for me to be, and guess what? He rewarded me. How absolutely amazing is His love? The day we are set to start our fertility, we find out we’re pregnant. I mean, come on, y’all. It’s been so hard for me to write this because I’ve just been crying the whole time in amazement of this miracle still. Our God is good, and He is good ALL THE TIME! My God performed a miracle, and I am forever grateful. I’m almost 5 months pregnant with Myers Dean Browning & he will be making his arrival on our anniversary this coming up April. Yeah, that’s right. We’re due on our anniversary in April. I can’t think of a better testimony for all to hear. Miracles are real.
We are SO blessed. We are SO happy. We are overjoyed with His love.